Full issue can be found here: http://www.tcs.cam.ac.uk/assets/downloads/TCS_Volume14_Michaelmas_Issue2.pdf
The problem I have with
the people who are here in
Cambridge currently is that
they’re not my people. I hope you
don’t take this in a weird sort of
pure race kind of way; all I mean
is, where are the people I know,
that I eat
lunch with
in Hall?
Where are
my library-book-sharing,
cup-of-tea-brewing,
bar-propping-up
mates? Why don’t I know anyone
in the smoking area at Life?
Oh, right. They’re actually
earning a living wage doing
Important Things while some of
us scrape by on some funding.
Doing some reading. And some
writing. Sometimes.
It’s hard not to be a little bit
estranged and more than a little
bit bitter about it all.
I don’t
really “get” this whole job
thing. It’s like children; just not
foreseeable in my near future.
In fact, that makes it more
like a dog, as children
aren’t foreseeable
anywhere in my
future. Not even
with a telescope
and a really tall ladder. But jobs
are where my people are at. They
are working for banks, for the
government, for literary agencies
and charities and schools. They
are training to be lawyers and
doctors and accountants.
And me? Well, yesterday I watched
4 episodes of ‘Grey’s Anatomy’,
crying at the end of every
single one, then baked a cake
and made a head start on some
pressing reading for a seminar…
which is actually not on for
another ten days. I don’t envy
my gainfully employed peers
the early starts (but hello, I’m a
boatie!), the tiredness and the
long days (I have worked before,
you know, in the vac. I am aware
of the tribulations) but I would
like some cash and some kind
of worldly status, please and
thank you, instead of the weary
glances you get from people on
announcing that you are a sort of
perpetual student.
Most of all I would like them
all, simultaneously, to sack it in
and come back for some sort of
last hoorah, really, because I am
not the world’s biggest fan of
the awkward Hall dance, where
I stand at the exit of the servery
and fruitlessly survey the tabled
landscape for all of the people
who used to accompany me
there.
Except, in the main, I’m
quite…well…glad that they’re
not present. I made a choice to
be here, just like they made a
choice to be elsewhere. They’re
happy, and I’m happy. They’re
back this weekend for the Old
Boys celebrations, and yes, we’ll
have a great time at dinner on
Saturday and at brunch the next
morning, but in all actuality
when they leave on Sunday I’ll
be le ft with the research for a
new paper that I’m itching to
crack on with, an MCR who are
really lovely and fun and a slowly
growing amount of current
undergraduates I know. These
might not be my people just yet,
but hopefully I’m one step closer
to becoming one of theirs. And if
you see me in the smoking area
at Life, please say hi.
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